This one is a lot of sap.
The Week in Selfies: 8/24/20 - 8/30/20
Hello all. Welcome to Sunday.
I am continuing on with the subscription donation project. This organization for August is Stop AAPI Hate. If you are new here (welcome!) or need a refresher about the project, you can always find more details of the project on my About page.
So, if you are enjoying this newsletter or connecting to it at all, I’d love if you would like, comment, or give it a social media shout out to help make the impact go farther. Or, if you could share the newsletter with just one other person, I will shout your praises from my rooftop. Probably! Even though I can’t access my roof! Because New York!
AND, when we reach 100 subscribers, I’ll start taking selfie submissions which I think will be FUN.
Long time readers know that I have been dancing around the weekly happy hours that were a staple of my first year and a half of the pandemic. Lots of mentions, little detail. Well, this week is a good week to expound on them.
Every Friday night (nearly). 6pm EST/3pm PST sharp (ish). BYOB. BYOC(ostumes). Zoom link to be sent at the text message go-ahead.
How’s that for detail? Good? Okay, great. I’m out!
Obviously, I’m kidding. That’s not all I’m going to say.
These weekly hours with two dear friends were my most consistent check-ins. Filled with laughter and talking about favorites and in-depth existential conversations, they lasted hours. The time together moved with us and how we were feeling. Happy hour was meant to let us be. No expectations. No judgments. Just be.
They were also a hell of a lot of fun. We implemented themes early on. Anything from dressing like someone with our names and dressing like our moms, to favorite early 2000s movie characters and movie adaptation characters. There was the History Channel. There was whatever was in our costume boxes. There was dressing up as each other for our birthdays. We covered it all.
Happy hours were a shared space. We took turns picking the themes, which opened the door for all sorts of interpretation and creativity. Of course, when it comes to me and picking well, anything, there will always be some sentimentality somewhere along the line.
So, for this particular week in 2020, I decided it would be fun to dress as a “woman who made me.” Not only that, but for us to make lists of women who made us and share them with each other.
I love a list. I love a sentimental list.
I made seven different lists of who made me: family, chosen family, characters, creators, teachers, moments, and enemies. (Yes, enemies.)
There wasn’t enough time in one happy hour to walk through all the women who inspired us, made us think and feel differently, people who have meant something to us for whatever reason, but we sure tried. We talked until none of us could keep our eyes open. It’s still one of my favorite happy hours.
To get an insight into who and what your friends find important is a true gift. You get to see where they’ve found their strength and what makes them happy. You learn about traits in other people they admire that they also have but don’t see in themselves. You understand moments that changed them.
AND you get to show them all that stuff about yourself. You get to talk about a mysterious great grandmother and a best friend who’s now more like a sister. You can tell tales of people who became enemies who also made you understand your worth. You can show a YouTube clip that changed the way you saw art and also made you realize that you are a wonderful weirdo. You can go back and live with characters who grew up with you, ones you outgrew, and ones you still hope to grow into.
Writing these lists made me understand what traits I really value in people. Everyone on the lists were all some combination of witty and smart, strong and kind, creative and driven, empathic and loving. They are all themselves, likable or not (something I’ve written about before). Nearly all of them have true moments of vulnerability, something I often struggle with.
I am staunchly of a mind that if someone is important to you or has made a difference in your life, the best thing to do is to tell people. Preferably the person themselves but, in some cases, that’s a bit out of reach. So, being able to share a whole list(s) of pivotal people with two other important people was really a bit of magic in a very tough time.
Oh, and next week, it’s your turn to pick the theme.
Monday, August 24, 2020
This was my first trip out of Manhattan proper in the pandemic. I went to Governors Island, my favorite place. As I said on my instagram from that day, “ people saying new york is dead. nah, she’s still standing.” and so was i.
Tuesday, August 25, 2020
Book seen in this reaching photo: Big Friendship.
Wednesday, August 26, 2020
She’s walking and taking a selfie? What is she? A witch???
Thursday, August 27, 2020
Yes, again. This is my face.
Friday, August 28, 2020
If ever I were to do stand-up, my alter ego will be a punk rock Mary Tyler Moore.
Saturday, August 29, 2020
Tell me how you look after drinking all night, laughing heartily with friends, and staying up until 4am.
Sunday, August 30, 2020
I was going to praise myself for being outside so much this week but this photo is literally on the side of my building so who knows how far I actually went?
This week, paying subscribers got a 1-minute play celebrating a dead guy (woo!). If that sounds intriguing to you, consider becoming a paid subscriber.